Unfinished/songs
Place for jotting down lyrics to songs in progress
Pull the Ladder Up
a "conservative" Christmas song
Put a great big smile on a job-creator's face
With earnings you must hide, and poor people outside
Give everything you can to your local retail chain
That socialist Santa Claus can't pry my guns from my dead paws
Chorus:
So pull the ladder up behind you this Christmas
If you help too much then it shows you don't really care.
Keep everyone in their place this Christmas
'Cuz they make you look higher up when they stay down there.
So pull the ladder up behind you this Christmas
Keep everyone in their place for goodness' sake.
Untitled #1
(Sung kind of like The Ramones meet "Not Fade Away")
- Now hush little baby, this won't take long
- Mama gonna sing you a rock 'n' roll song
- Gonna tell you all about the birds 'n' the bees
- 'N' the people who work for the record companies
Untitled #2
song I dreamed I was helping John Lennon record
- Can we go back where we were tomorrow yesterday?
- I wasn't finished wandering, there wasn't time to play
- Can I have my feelings back tomorrow yesterday?
- I really wasn't happy when you took them all away
- I don't know where you've taken them
...
- Can we have the future we once had tomorrow yesterday?
Unfinished Parodies
to the tune of "Doe, a Deer"
- D'oh! - a goof, a major goof
- Yay. - an apathetic cry
- Gee... -
- Blah - a day without much fun
Take a Nap on Me
a song for Pip
- If I'm trying to work
- And you know my lap is free
- Though I'm quite busy
- Take a nap on me
- If you lay your furry head
- So it's in the way
- Then you'll be very sure
- Nothing's done today
Be a Man
With all the spots of an aging liver
With all the grace of a drunk baboon
With all the sense of a roaring fire
Incisive as the sharp side of a spoon