Xmas Benefit Song
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- written: 2004-10-19
- tune: combo of "Stop Yer Ticklin' Jock", "Hark the Herald Angels Sing", and "Dinner Bell"
- thanks to Insaniquarium, TMBG, and The XBAs for inspiration
A Christmas Benefit Song
- Star of wonder, star so bright
- Shining in my eyes tonight
- I wish I may I wish I might
- Get some peaceful sleep tonight
- God is great and God is good
- God lives in your neighborhood
- But if you don't get out of town
- I will burn the whole thing down.
- Make a promise, make a wish
- Put it under a covered dish
- Covered dish will keep it hid
- So no-one knows what you just did
- But if there's nothing underneath
- I will take back all my teeth
- And if you don't hear all my terms
- I'm gonna open a can of worms.
- Hush my baby, don't you pout
- We will put all your fires out
- Fire's out so you can play
- You can start one another day.
- All these fires everywhere
- Shows the world how much you care
- and when you've burned up everything
- I will give you a piece of string
- And if you open that can of worms
- You'll have to listen to my terms.
- Ring your bell out in the air
- Tell the world how the world's not fair.
- Ring your bell so we will know
- It's time to spend up all our dough
- But if you don't leave me alone
- Then I'll ignore your telephone.
- And if you leave me a piece of string
- I will tie up everything
- A ring ring ring, a ding ding ding
- I will give you a piece of string
- A ring ring ring, a ding ding dong
- You need to know that something's wrong
- A dong dang dong, a ding dang ding
- I'm gonna blow up all... your... string