Unfinished/parodies: Difference between revisions

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[[category:lyrics]]
[[category:lyrics]]
[[category:parody]]
[[category:unfinished]]
[[category:unfinished]]
[[category:parodies]]
 
===About the Universe===
see also: [[/MoG]]
==Radar Lunch==
''actually wrote this years ago, surprised to not find it here''
<poem>
<poem>
Facts are flowing out like endless rain 'cause I just make them up
When I get hungry and I need something to munch
I blither wildly as I make my claims about the universe
She takes a frozen meal and heats it up a bunch
 
We don't need an oven at all!
My thoughts are tangled like a hopeless mess, I have no idea what I mean
We... got a thing... that's called... radar lunch...
And so I say whatever comes to mind about the universe
</poem>
 
==Harper Valley ISP==
: Like a caaa-arr sales...man... omm...
''originally posted [https://toot.cat/@woozle/4000319 here]''
: Nothing's gonna change my mind
<poem>
: Nothing's gonna change my mind
Well the note said "Mrs. Johnson, you're pullin' down data way too fast
: Nothing's gonna change my mind
It's reported you've been doin' lots of super-hi-def homebrew multicast
: Nothing's gonna change my mind
And we don't believe you oughta be a-usin' insecure technology."
 
And it was signed yours sincerely from the Harper Valley ISP
Never mind that bronze-age herdsmen didn't know a thing
</poem>
beyond the patch of land on which they lived
==Morning Is Busted==
much less about the universe
<poem>
 
Morning is busted -- and I ain't fixin' it
Never mind your scientists who look at evidence
I cain't be trusted to get it right.
My answers are in Genesis and what it says about the universe
Pray it's in one piece
 
Pray I don't blow somethin' up
: Like a caaa-arr sales...man... omm...
Pray there ain't flames goin' up in the night.
: Nothing's gonna change my mind
: Nothing's gonna change my mind
: Nothing's gonna change my mind
: Nothing's gonna change my mind
</poem>
</poem>
 
==Mister Spam Man==
===White Room at Tenagra===
(No specific lyrics yet; [[wikipedia:Darmok|this]] is just something that needs to be written...)
===Gray Christmas===
<poem>
<poem>
I'm looking at a gray Christmas
Mister Spam Man -- sell me a scheme
Not like the ones we used to know
Make me the heir of a Nigerian queen
When the globe is warming
[...]
There'll be no snow forming
And tell me that my mounting debt is over
Just a winter mix to make the traffic slow


I'm looking at a gray Christmas
Mister Spam Man -- give me a loan
Not like the ones we used to know
For only $50, a million I'll own
Now the climate's changing
It's re-arranging
The jet stream, and what happens down below


I'm looking at a gray Christmas
So cook up your greatest scheme --
Without a flake of snow in sight
Mister Spam Man, sell me a dream!
May you enjoy December
As you remember
When all your Christmases were white.
</poem>
</poem>
===D'Oh, A Goof===
 
==D'Oh, A Goof==
''to the tune of "Doe, a Deer"
''to the tune of "Doe, a Deer"


Line 66: Line 56:
</poem>
</poem>


===Take a Nap on Me===
==Take a Nap on Me==
''a song for Pip''
''a song for Pip''


Line 77: Line 67:
:Then you'll be very sure
:Then you'll be very sure
:Nothing's done today
:Nothing's done today
===Be a Man===
==Be a Man==
<poem>
<poem>
With all the spots of an aging liver
With all the spots of an aging liver
Line 86: Line 76:
With all the charm of a raging lawyer
With all the charm of a raging lawyer
</poem>
</poem>
==The Microbe Swims Tonight==
''This part written 2008-05-04''
:In the culture, the germ cell culture, the microbe swims tonight
:In the culture, the active culture, the microbe swims tonight
: (chorus) ''Amoeba-weh, amoeba-weh...''
==L-Y (real-life version)==
''This part written 2006-10-23''
:You're driving I-85
:When you see your exit arrive
:How do you change lanes as it goes by?
:''Dangerously... dangerously... dangerous'', '''L-Y'''.
==Spam in the Place Where You Are==
''This part written 2005-07-25''
:'''Spam'''! in the place where you work (file as junk)
:Think about vacations in the sunny Bahamas, with
:'''Spam'''! in the place where you live (empty trash)
:Get a lower mortgage rate and wonder why you hadn't before
==I Am Mr. Spock==
* '''parody of''': {{l/wp|I Am a Rock}}
<poem>
On a planet dark and [...]
I have my phaser
And my nerve-pinch to protect me
I am shielded with my force-field
I do not feel emotion
There is none in my brain
Its utter lack of logic I disdain
CHORUS:
I'm Mister Spock
I am a Vuuu...lcan
And a Vulcan feels no pain
On the starship Enterprise.
</poem>
==Misc.==

Latest revision as of 15:27, 3 November 2023


see also: /MoG

Radar Lunch

actually wrote this years ago, surprised to not find it here

When I get hungry and I need something to munch
She takes a frozen meal and heats it up a bunch
We don't need an oven at all!
We... got a thing... that's called... radar lunch...

Harper Valley ISP

originally posted here

Well the note said "Mrs. Johnson, you're pullin' down data way too fast
It's reported you've been doin' lots of super-hi-def homebrew multicast
And we don't believe you oughta be a-usin' insecure technology."
And it was signed yours sincerely from the Harper Valley ISP

Morning Is Busted

Morning is busted -- and I ain't fixin' it
I cain't be trusted to get it right.
Pray it's in one piece
Pray I don't blow somethin' up
Pray there ain't flames goin' up in the night.

Mister Spam Man

Mister Spam Man -- sell me a scheme
Make me the heir of a Nigerian queen
[...]
And tell me that my mounting debt is over

Mister Spam Man -- give me a loan
For only $50, a million I'll own

So cook up your greatest scheme --
Mister Spam Man, sell me a dream!

D'Oh, A Goof

to the tune of "Doe, a Deer"

D'oh! - a goof, a major goof
Yay. - an apathetic cry
Gee... - I say, not quite a curse
Blah - a word without much fun
So... - I don't know what to say
Umm... - a grunt to follow "so"
See... - another ploy for time
And that brings us back to...

Take a Nap on Me

a song for Pip

If I'm trying to work
And you know my lap is free
Though I'm quite busy
Take a nap on me
If you lay your furry head
So it's in the way
Then you'll be very sure
Nothing's done today

Be a Man

With all the spots of an aging liver
With all the grace of a drunk baboon
With all the sense of a roaring fire
Incisive as the sharp side of a spoon

With all the charm of a raging lawyer

The Microbe Swims Tonight

This part written 2008-05-04

In the culture, the germ cell culture, the microbe swims tonight
In the culture, the active culture, the microbe swims tonight
(chorus) Amoeba-weh, amoeba-weh...

L-Y (real-life version)

This part written 2006-10-23

You're driving I-85
When you see your exit arrive
How do you change lanes as it goes by?
Dangerously... dangerously... dangerous, L-Y.

Spam in the Place Where You Are

This part written 2005-07-25

Spam! in the place where you work (file as junk)
Think about vacations in the sunny Bahamas, with
Spam! in the place where you live (empty trash)
Get a lower mortgage rate and wonder why you hadn't before

I Am Mr. Spock

On a planet dark and [...]

I have my phaser
And my nerve-pinch to protect me
I am shielded with my force-field
I do not feel emotion
There is none in my brain
Its utter lack of logic I disdain

CHORUS:
I'm Mister Spock
I am a Vuuu...lcan

And a Vulcan feels no pain
On the starship Enterprise.

Misc.

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